Falling in Love with the Church Again
Renewing Your Heart
Key Verse:
"Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her."
—Ephesians 5:25b
Recognize the Drift
Losing love for the church doesn’t usually happen overnight. It creeps in. A snide comment here. A divisive meeting there. A pattern of unmet needs or a string of difficult discussions. Before long, you start guarding your heart not just from pain—but from people.
You might find yourself thinking:
“If I didn’t have to preach this Sunday, I’d skip church.”
“They just don’t care.”
“No matter what I do, it’s not enough.”
These thoughts may be understandable, but they’re also a warning sign. Ministry has become mechanical, and your heart needs attention.
Return to the Head of the Church
The church is not ultimately your responsibility—it belongs to Christ. And only by returning to Him as the true Shepherd can your love for His people be renewed.
Spend time in the Gospels, not as a preacher mining for material, but as a disciple being ministered to. Let Jesus reintroduce Himself to you—not just as Savior, but as the Lover of the Church.
He still sees His bride with compassion. He still washes her with the Word. He still lays down His life for her. And if you let Him, He will restore your affection for His people through the lens of grace.
Reframe Your Expectations
Some of your frustration stems not from failure—but from false expectations. The church was never meant to be perfect. The New Testament letters are full of correction, rebuke, and exhortation. Paul, Peter, James, and John all wrote to messy, broken, sometimes dysfunctional churches.
Yet they loved them. They served them. And they kept calling them saints.
Stop expecting your church to be heaven on earth. It’s not. It’s a hospital, a workshop, a family in progress. And you are a patient, a laborer, and a brother right in the middle of it.
Rekindle Joy in Small Things
You may not have a revival every Sunday, but you do have moments of ministry that matter:
The widow who thanked you for calling her.
The child who remembered your sermon illustration.
The couple who stayed married because of your counsel.
The person who came to Christ after months of prayer.
These are not small things—they are glimpses of God’s faithfulness.
Keep a gratitude journal. Revisit encouragement notes. Look into the eyes of your congregation—not for applause, but for the quiet confirmation that God is using you.
Reconnect With Fellow Laborers
Ministry is lonely when you try to carry it alone. Spend time with other pastors. Talk honestly. Pray for one another. Laugh together. Share burdens.
Isolation is a breeding ground for resentment. But community is a garden where love is cultivated.
Don’t fall into the trap of comparing your church to someone else’s highlight reel. Let iron sharpen iron—not ego sharpen ego.
Prayer Thought:
Father, my heart has grown weary, and at times, cold toward Your church. Forgive me for when I’ve loved ministry more than people, or duty more than delight. Renew in me a genuine affection for Your bride. Remind me of her beauty, her value, and her future glory. Give me grace to shepherd her with joy, even when it’s hard. May I serve not from obligation, but out of love. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Pastoring Tip:
Schedule a Sabbath for your soul. Set aside a day—monthly or quarterly—where you're not a pastor, just a son or daughter of God. Worship without leading. Read without preparing. Pray without performing. Loving the church well begins with letting God love you first.
Note: All Scripture from the NIV Bible Translation.
Very much needed. Thanks for sharing
What a timely message pastor!
Love reading your posts, especially on pastoral!