When You're the One Who Needs Counseling
Seeking Help without Shame
Key Verse:
“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”
—Galatians 6:2
The Silent Weight Pastors Carry
Pastors carry burdens no one sees.
We’re the ones people call during emergencies.
We’re expected to comfort, guide, and encourage—often without ever being asked how we’re doing.
And somewhere between the sermons and the hospital visits, between the leadership meetings and the midnight texts… the soul of the shepherd begins to fray.
But what happens when it’s not the congregation that needs help—but you?
Counseling Isn’t a Weakness—It’s Wisdom
There’s a lie many pastors believe: “If I go to counseling, it means I’m unfit to lead.”
Nothing could be further from the truth.
Even Moses needed Jethro to challenge his boundaries (Exodus 18). Even David poured out his soul to the Lord in raw vulnerability. Even Paul admitted that he “despaired of life itself” (2 Corinthians 1:8).
Getting help doesn’t disqualify you—it strengthens you.
A counselor isn’t a critic. They’re a companion for the dark road. And in many cases, God uses them to speak clarity, correction, and comfort into our chaos.
Confessing Without Collapse
Pastors often fear that if they open up about anxiety, depression, burnout, or even bitterness, they’ll fall apart. But confession isn’t collapse—it’s cleansing.
James 5:16 calls us to “confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.”
You don’t need to announce your counseling appointments from the pulpit. But you do need someone in your life who isn’t looking to be pastored by you—someone whose job is to help you be healthy.
Burnout is Not a Badge
Too many pastors wear burnout like a medal. “I’m running on empty because I’m doing the Lord’s work!”
But Jesus never called you to self-destruction in the name of ministry. He called you to abide. To rest. To cast your cares on Him.
Even Jesus retreated. Even Jesus slept in the boat.
You are not above needing rest. You are not beyond needing help.
Hypothetical: “What Will People Think?”
Let’s say you quietly begin counseling. Someone in your church finds out.
They come up and say, “Pastor… I heard you’re seeing a counselor. Is everything okay?”
Your response?
“Yes, actually. I care about my spiritual and emotional health, and this helps me stay strong for the people I serve.”
That’s not a confession of failure. That’s an act of leadership.
You’re modeling what it means to pursue healing—and giving others permission to do the same.
Help Isn’t Just for the Hurting—It’s for the Honest
You don’t have to be in crisis to seek counsel. Sometimes the most proactive thing you can do is sit with someone trained to help you process what’s building before it breaks.
Pastoral health doesn’t come from stoicism—it comes from sanctification. And part of that sanctifying work is being honest enough to say, “I can’t carry this alone.”
You were never meant to.
Prayer Thought
Father, thank You for those who help carry burdens. When I feel overwhelmed, remind me that seeking help is not shameful—it’s spiritual wisdom. Lead me to people and resources that point me back to You. Give me the courage to be honest, the humility to receive help, and the strength to walk forward in grace. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Pastoring Tip of the Week
Build trusted, confidential relationships with Christian counselors in your area. Not just for your congregation—but for yourself. Have the number saved. Make the call when needed. Healthy pastors build healthy churches.
💡 Recommended Reads for Pastors Who Need Pastoring
If you're walking through emotional exhaustion, spiritual weariness, or mental battles, these trusted resources can provide clarity, hope, and healing:
📘 The Emotionally Healthy Leader by Peter Scazzero
This foundational book will help you transform your inner life as a leader so your outer ministry flows from a place of spiritual depth. A must-read for every pastor.
📘 The Weary Leader’s Guide to Burnout: A Journey from Exhaustion to Wholeness by Sean Nemecek
Written specifically for ministry leaders, this honest guide walks you through the valleys of burnout and toward the restoration of body, mind, and soul.
📘 Don't Give the Enemy a Seat at Your Table by Louie Giglio
Giglio’s practical and spiritual insights will help you recognize the enemy’s voice, reject his lies, and reclaim a peaceful, Christ-centered mindset in the heat of leadership battles.
Note: All Scripture from the NIV Bible Translation.